Episode #66 "Viking Bikers From Hell"

[airtommy]

I had always rated this a 1 out of 10, one of the worst eps in S1/S2/S3.  I decided to rewatch it after I learned that John Milius wrote the story.

I now "get" this ep.  I'm upgrading it to a "3".   I can see what he was aiming for and the idea had real potential.  I liked Reb Brown and I liked his character.

But the execution was terrible.  The director gets an "F".  Problems:

• Japanese racing bikes
• the awkward dialogue between C&T at the end
• 2 gunshots making 3 wounds
• Crockett goes to a funeral to maintain his cover, but then shows up at every crime scene with the cops
• weird exploding gun effects
• a dude who sounds like Jeff Spicoli is Miami's biggest drug kingpin
• trained psychologist compares ordinary criminal to historical psychos.

I wish Milius had directed the ep.  He wouldn't have made such a mess of it.

P.S.  DJAngel posted pics from the filming of this ep:

https://miamiviceonline.com/index.php?/topic/2458-miami-vice-~-1st-trip-to-miami-feb-1987/

 

Edited July 18, 2022 by airtommy

[ViceFanMan]

On 7/4/2021 at 6:43 PM, ViceFanMan said:

This is definitely an example of the writers dropping the proverbial ball...one of the most pathetic of the season!  Here’s my original review from ‘13. Not much has changed with my thoughts:

[This is not one of season 3's best episodes for sure...probably only the 2nd worst of the season next to "Everybody's In Showbiz". This one is just over-the-top ridiculous, and the opening was bizarre.  I don't really like or care about anything Viking,  however, these whacked-out, psychotic bikers hardly had anything "Viking" about them...other than their pleasure and obsession with violence and bloodshed. I also felt like my IQ dropped multiple points every time one of the so-called Viking bikers even spoke! 

Some of the fashion and Jan Hammer music was awesome, and the end shoot-out scene was pretty cool! I also liked the "kill" with the drug-dealer/crime boss falling face-first into his birthday cake after being hit.   But, other than those few aspects this episode was very weak and goofball. It left you going...huh??  ]

Also, I remember you used to be able to see the original ratings/numbers for each episode that someone had chose for their rating (I realize that everyone has their opinions), but I remember thinking & asking originally...who the heck rated this "booger" a 10?? LOL! But, to each his or her own.  

I originally gave it a 4...but that may have been too nice...if I could re-rate this episode it’d probably only get a 3. I'd say that rather than ‘Viking Bikers’ from Hell, that this is the episode from Hell...but that in actuality probably belongs to "Missing Hours". 

My most recent review above.

52 minutes ago, airtommy said:

I had always rated this a 1 out of 10, one of the worst eps in S1/S2/S3.  I decided to rewatch it after I learned that John Milius wrote the story.

I now "get" this ep.  I'm upgrading it to a "3".   I can see what he was aiming for and the idea had real potential.  I liked Reb Brown and I liked his character.

But the execution was terrible.  The director gets an "F".  Problems:

• Japanese racing bikes
• the awkward dialogue between C&T at the end
• 2 gunshots making 3 wounds
• Crockett goes to a funeral to maintain his cover, but then shows up at every crime scene with the cops
• weird exploding gun effects
• a dude who sounds like Jeff Spicoli is Miami's biggest drug kingpin
• trained psychologist compares ordinary criminal to historical psychos.

I wish Milius had directed the ep.  He wouldn't have made such a mess of it.

P.S.  DJAngel posted pics from the filming of this ep:

https://miamiviceonline.com/index.php?/topic/2458-miami-vice-~-1st-trip-to-miami-feb-1987/

 

I too rated this about a 3...however, a 2 might be more accurate. Total ridiculous cluster-crap that makes no sense. Definitely an example of how the show started to drop the proverbial ball, with bizarre, whacked-out episodes. The only episode worse than this one for the season, was “Everybody’s In Showbiz”. 

[Augusta]

I can't argue in support of this episode.  As a Season-3 episode, it has to sit alongside some episodes that are not only very competent, but are also still retaining the correct "VICE personality".  The episode can't afford to be a slouch, or afford to slide by like a (...umm) Season-4 or Season-5 story. For some bad episodes I could make a plea for it's dignity (like Miracle Man or Leap of Faith), and say it COULD have been a solid episode if only they had used the story's potential better.  But there's not even any potential I could see in Viking Bikers from Hell.
 
I've never been a fan of Reb Brown's camera portrayals, no matter if it's comedy or shoot-em-up (...and for some goofy reason I can't get out of mind this lead role he had in an early Captain America tv series....).  He was poorly chosen to portray the gang leader, as was the dark-haired sidekick, another actor we've seen too many times as a not-to-be-taken-seriously action movie villain.  These guys just start shooting each other and laughing about it.  If Crockett leaves them alone long enough, they'd just shoot each other all away, and the Miami police won't have to lift a finger.  Hollywood thought getting someone to wear leather on a bike and no smiling instantly produces that Terminator menace they want.  But the Terminator look wasn't some easy thing you dial up on command---Arnold was successful because he really fitted it well--his pink lips and underbite jaw, how his butt shape looks in jeans, and his slightly high-heels walk in the biker boots--EARNED the effect of awkward scary machine.  Reb Brown doesn't earn an traits for his part.  The actors from Crockett's Bad Timing episode earned the badness of their characters a bit.  But Reb and his team, not at all.

I even tried watching this in the Spanish translation version, which worked really well when I tried it with Olivia Brown's Season-4 episode Missing Hours. But Viking Bikers was just as poor in Spanish-dubbing as it is in English.    Missing Hours was quite acceptable viewing when you don't understand Spanish--but now I'm beginning to realize that was only because Trudy was..... you know, Trudy!  She's a universal language.
Reb Brown,...well, he doesn't speak to me in the same language.

[apocalypse]

The worst thing about this was definitely the Japanese bikes. That was embarrassing as if those guys were portraying to be Hells Angels or such...

The bikers looked the part and were definitely believable huge steroid freaks but very bad actors.

Best things about this rather poor episode: Joke about Valhalla/Europe and the Damned "Tightrope Walk" in the end. That is one amazing tune.

 

[fakespyder]

Also, props to Izzy for trying to downplay Sonny and Rico as anyone Reb should be interested in. (Calling them "small time" or something along those lines).

[RedDragon86]

On 7/18/2022 at 4:01 AM, airtommy said:

I had always rated this a 1 out of 10, one of the worst eps in S1/S2/S3.  I decided to rewatch it after I learned that John Milius wrote the story.

I now "get" this ep.  I'm upgrading it to a "3".   I can see what he was aiming for and the idea had real potential.  I liked Reb Brown and I liked his character.

But the execution was terrible.  The director gets an "F".  Problems:

• Japanese racing bikes
• the awkward dialogue between C&T at the end
• 2 gunshots making 3 wounds
• Crockett goes to a funeral to maintain his cover, but then shows up at every crime scene with the cops
• weird exploding gun effects
• a dude who sounds like Jeff Spicoli is Miami's biggest drug kingpin
• trained psychologist compares ordinary criminal to historical psychos.

I wish Milius had directed the ep.  He wouldn't have made such a mess of it.

P.S.  DJAngel posted pics from the filming of this ep:

https://miamiviceonline.com/index.php?/topic/2458-miami-vice-~-1st-trip-to-miami-feb-1987/

 

Haha "The Wire" looked like he could have hung out with Wayne and Garth at the weekends.

It is beyond ridiculous that this dweeb controlled a third of the drugs in Miami. Fuente or the guy next in line to Orlando would be in control, even Grocero would smash these bikers to pieces in a second.

[Sebax]

Well I kinda like this one because is quite different from any other MV ep.

It's obviously over the top and exagerated, but I dig it.

Reb is like a mix of Terminator, Ivan Drago and the rude coach of Karate Kid.

 

7/10

[Miami Beau]

On 9/5/2022 at 1:27 PM, RedDragon86 said:

Haha "The Wire" looked like he could have hung out with Wayne and Garth at the weekends.

It is beyond ridiculous that this dweeb controlled a third of the drugs in Miami. Fuente or the guy next in line to Orlando would be in control, even Grocero would smash these bikers to pieces in a second.

That’s the problem, the writers never took into account what had come before and made The Wire Constantine the drug lord successor. That’s ok but why was he not name dropped throughout season 3. Silly. Wish I could go back in time to the writers room in 1987 and give them a Miami Vice history lesson.

Edited September 10, 2022 by Miami Beau

[gazzaa2]

I found this episode unintentionally hilarious. It's got that bad B movie vibe to it but still got that cool vice vibe to it.

The terrible acting from the bikers. "Is this some kind of joke", "On you!". "He could have been a friend!". Man falls in cake on cue.

 

 

 

[Robbie C.]

On 9/10/2022 at 2:26 PM, Miami Beau said:

That’s the problem, the writers never took into account what had come before and made The Wire Constantine the drug lord successor. That’s ok but why was he not name dropped throughout season 3. Silly. Wish I could go back in time to the writers room in 1987 and give them a Miami Vice history lesson.

Vice was never really good at this kind of internal continuity, though. This episode is no exception, but rather pretty common.

[RedDragon86]

I thought it was a pretty tidy ship in the first 2 seasons.

Seems to forget itself after that, production changes I guess.

 

Edited September 13, 2022 by RedDragon86

[fakespyder]

I agree with you @RedDragon86... With the exception of Payback.

Great episode, but it left Sonny hanging out there with a target on his back. I remember thinking the next episode would address it but the show just moved on to other things.

It felt a bit odd,

[RedDragon86]

5 hours ago, fakespyder said:

I agree with you @RedDragon86... With the exception of Payback.

Great episode, but it left Sonny hanging out there with a target on his back. I remember thinking the next episode would address it but the show just moved on to other things.

It felt a bit odd,

I think there really was much time left in the season to resolve it and maybe Fuente and they others were waiting for the right moment? It would have been great if they started season 3 with the sequel to "Payback" and Frank Zappa returned for 5 minutes of screen time at they end.

By they end of the episode Fuente tells Sonny that he knows he was setup "I know you didn't take my money Crockett" and he puts the word out to everybody, reassuring him. 

 

 

Edited September 14, 2022 by RedDragon86

[Miami Beau]

On 9/14/2022 at 2:07 PM, RedDragon86 said:

By they end of the episode Fuente tells Sonny that he knows he was setup "I know you didn't take my money Crockett" and he puts the word out to everybody, reassuring him. 

 

 

And then the camera cuts to Crockett and he says “Hey pal, your telling me I cut my hair and threw out all my white jackets for nothing?”  

Edited September 16, 2022 by Miami Beau

[Miami Beau]

On 9/14/2022 at 8:18 AM, fakespyder said:

I remember thinking the next episode would address it but the show just moved on to other things.

It felt a bit odd,

They kinda did subtlety with Crockett not being present for the first 15 minutes of the episode (minus the opening). In my eyes Crockett was being grilled by IAD/DEA about what the hell went on out there in the ocean. Pending further details, Crockett was free to go and joined the OCB team at the safe house. They should of definitely had that scene or at least a mention of it in Free Verse. 

[dragon48]

I'm slowly watching the series in order and got to this episode.  I'm sure it's abundantly clear that season four's "Missing Hours," is the worst episode in the series.  I have a lot more episodes to go, but so far, in my opinion, "Viking Bikers from Hell" is the second worst episode.  The plot is boring, and the acting is awful.  

In the opening scene, after Reb kills a fellow gang member biker because he doesn't want to have to ride on the back of his motorcycle, Lascoe starts laughing hysterically.  The problem was that the type of laughter was out of place.  He was neither laughing at Reb, nor with him, nor was he laughing at the situation.  The laughter appeared to be schizophrenic in nature; an out of place reaction.  Did the director really want the effect, or was John Matuszak just an awful actor?

Also, what's with all of the distant, overhead shots?  Was this supposed to show that the people were small parts of something much bigger?  What were those oddly shot scenes attempting to convey?

[ViceFanMan]

3 hours ago, dragon48 said:

I'm slowly watching the series in order and got to this episode.  I'm sure it's abundantly clear that season four's "Missing Hours," is the worst episode in the series.  I have a lot more episodes to go, but so far, in my opinion, "Viking Bikers from Hell" is the second worst episode.  The plot is boring, and the acting is awful.  

In the opening scene, after Reb kills a fellow gang member biker because he doesn't want to have to ride on the back of his motorcycle, Lascoe starts laughing hysterically.  The problem was that the type of laughter was out of place.  He was neither laughing at Reb, nor with him, nor was he laughing at the situation.  The laughter appeared to be schizophrenic in nature; an out of place reaction.  Did the director really want the effect, or was John Matuszak just an awful actor?

Also, what's with all of the distant, overhead shots?  Was this supposed to show that the people were small parts of something much bigger?  What were those oddly shot scenes attempting to convey?

Agreed...this episode was ridiculous, stupid, and even bizarre! Yes...I’m sure the majority agree that “Missing Hours” was the worst episode of the entire series (I think possibly of television history ). 

Although I think “Miracle Man” is the 2nd worst episode...this one (“Viking Bikers”) & “Everybody’s In Showbiz” probably tie for the 3rd worst. Then there’s “Cows of October”...which isn’t too far behind, either.  

[Dadrian]

It’s a little wild, and unbelievable, but I love this episode. There are some good locations, great music, and cool costumes. 

And even casual fans remember the falling overboard stunt near the end  

[johnnyfarragut]

Sonny Landham makes this so-so episode worthwhile for me. He has the best line: " Valhalla! Good. Always wanted to go to Europe'. 

The episode script, in case someone's interested:

miami vice-viking bikers from hell.pdf

[RedDragon86]

On 1/7/2023 at 12:26 AM, dragon48 said:

I'm slowly watching the series in order and got to this episode.  I'm sure it's abundantly clear that season four's "Missing Hours," is the worst episode in the series.  I have a lot more episodes to go, but so far, in my opinion, "Viking Bikers from Hell" is the second worst episode.  The plot is boring, and the acting is awful.  

In the opening scene, after Reb kills a fellow gang member biker because he doesn't want to have to ride on the back of his motorcycle, Lascoe starts laughing hysterically.  The problem was that the type of laughter was out of place.  He was neither laughing at Reb, nor with him, nor was he laughing at the situation.  The laughter appeared to be schizophrenic in nature; an out of place reaction.  Did the director really want the effect, or was John Matuszak just an awful actor?

Also, what's with all of the distant, overhead shots?  Was this supposed to show that the people were small parts of something much bigger?  What were those oddly shot scenes attempting to convey?

I think it was Toad that laughed awkwardly.

Toad and Lascoe were suppose to be afraid of Reb, maybe he was laughing out of fear? like has trying to defuse the situation but I always had a problem with Reb Brown as this terrifying, intimidating character they should have given the part to Rutger Hauer to make things more convincing.

I do enjoy this on an entertaining level but my main problem is who the producers picked to play The Wire and Reb.

The Wire should have been someone like Kris Kristofferson and Reb played by Rutger Hauer.

 

[ViceFanMan]

On 1/6/2023 at 6:26 PM, dragon48 said:

"Viking Bikers from Hell" is the second worst episode.  The plot is boring, and the acting is awful.

I agree especially that the plot makes no sense nor has any point??  It’s ridiculous, serves no purpose really, and I definitely agree the acting was terrible...in some scenes it’s almost slap-stick comical, like an SNL spoof of an action episode.  Although I think “Miracle Man” was worse, this episode & “Everybody’s In Showbiz” are definitely poor & terrible ones!  

[johnnyfarragut]

The episode is apparently based on a movie script John Milius intended to direct, called 'Fatal Beauty'. The project went to someone else. This is Milius' revision of the original script:

 

Fatal Beauty (John Milius) [08-19-1986] [Revised Screenplay] [Scan].pdf

[ViceFanMan]

40 minutes ago, johnnyfarragut said:

The episode is apparently based on a movie script John Milius intended to direct, called 'Fatal Beauty'. The project went to someone else. This is Milius' revision of the original script:

 

Fatal Beauty (John Milius) [08-19-1986] [Revised Screenplay] [Scan].pdf 7.65 MB · 1 download

Interesting...maybe if they had done a feature film on its own about bikers in some wasteland (just going by the first little bit I glanced of the script), it might have fared better? But, as an episode of MV it was ridiculous and a poor choice.  

[Robbie C.]

Pretty typical Millius fare, really. Kent Anderson also did some "biker" stuff for him around the same time (writing and research mostly). I think I'd call it "Bike-sploitation" stuff.

[johnnyfarragut]

so what happens with the sister and the Krugerrands? She just vanishes with them.

Pretty hypocritical on her part: she doesn't like how his brother makes money, but she sure likes the money.