sredd Posted December 2, 2008 Report Share Posted December 2, 2008 Dating:1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.2. Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago."3. Establish, with her parents, what time she is expected back. Some will say 10 p.m.; others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.Theater Etiquette:1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended.2. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.Weddings:1. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.4. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for this special occasion.Driving Etiquette1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the deer is in sight.2. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tire always has the right of way.3. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.4. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.5. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dadrian Posted December 2, 2008 Report Share Posted December 2, 2008 i always loved this one from jeff foxworthy:"if you smoked at your wedding...you might be a redneck!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators timm525 Posted December 2, 2008 Administrators Report Share Posted December 2, 2008 Those were great! Thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richie Rich Posted December 2, 2008 Report Share Posted December 2, 2008 The ultimate redneck wedding present:Chainsaw Bayonet Zombie Killing Devicehttp://gizmodo.com/5100331/a-chainsaw-bayonet-strapped-to-an-ar+15-rifle-is-the-ultimate-zombie-killing-weapon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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